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Facts on domestic violence section...
The Facts
You're not alone
The Government defines domestic violence as
“Any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial or emotional) between adults who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality.”
This includes issues of concern to BME (black and minority ethnic) communities such as so called ‘honour based violence’, female genital mutilation and forced marriages.
If you are in a violent
or abusive relationship or you are supporting someone in that situation you can
get help.
Our charity and website is one way that you can get help.
View the various sections of the website for more advice and information and get in contact with us.
The kind of thing that domestic abuse and violence can include are name calling and any form of verbal abuse or threats. This can include, manipulation, blackmail,
or insults.
The violence can be any kind of physical or sexual
violence including punching, kicking, biting, shoving through to sexual assaults, rape, threats to kill, injuries caused by weapons.
Abuse also includes withholding of medication, food or money and any other words or actions that make you feel threatened or in fear for yours or someone else’s safety.
Domestic violence also includes actions that are committed by others on the instruction of your abuser. The list here is not exhaustive, we could not include everything.
Who does it happen to?
Domestic violence can occur in any relationship, but the majority of victims are women and children. Men can be victims also. Anyone can become the victims including mothers, fathers, siblings, cousins, children, in fact any relative or partner. They can be from any kind of background, class, race, culture, ethnic group, sexuality, religion, disability, lifestyle or age.
Who are the perpetrators?
The majority are men who abuse their partners however similarly to the range of victims the abusers can also be women. The abusers can come from any background or walk of life.
Domestic Violence has no boundaries, or restrictions about who does it, who becomes a victim or where it happens.
Common triggers for Domestic Violence.
There are some triggers and causes that contribute to domestic violence however all situations are different and you cannot attribute all domestic violence to any one set of factors. But certain attitudes which stem from being sexist, racist, homophobic or misogynistic can support the belief that domestic violence is acceptable. Alcohol and drug misuse can be a factor for some people, as well as pregnancy, financial pressures and other changes such as bereavements, mental ill health and trauma’s.
Factors that stop victims from leaving
There are many people who simply cannot understand why a person suffering domestic violence would not just walk away and leave. Whilst every case is different the following are some of the reasons that make it difficult for people to leave:-
•Financial – joint mortgages, finances, being owed money, joint debts or savings, reliance on a bread winner, lack of confidence with money
•Emotional dependence – low self esteem and self worth damage a persons confidence
•Fear of being chased, or being unable to escape, fear of escalation. A person is usually at the highest risk when planning or making their escape.
•Homelessness – having nowhere to go. Temporary and emergency housing is not easy to access and it could mean moving you and your family out of the area where you have friends and family
•Fear of the abuser threatening other people like your family and friends if you have disappeared
•Job loss – if you work the abuser may turn up there, or you may have to finish your job and not be in a position to do that financially. You might have business ties with the abuser, possibly work together
•Pregnancy
•Ill Health
•Number of children to consider
•You may not speak or read English
•Isolation
•You may not have access to services through not being a UK citizen
•Status/Profile – some people genuinely feel they do not want it to become public knowledge, figures in the media or public life, for example.
•Religious or cultural beliefs around remaining loyal and married.
•Pressure from family and friends to put up with it
There are other variations on these points but this was just to highlight some reasons why it is not very easy to walk away.
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